hola! it's 11:30 and i'm tired as shit, not to mention i have to leave for maryland at 8 a.m for more testing a john hopkins. but it's been a while and i'm in the mood to wriiite!
junior year is almost over! i've been dying to get out of midlothian high school since the very first day of freshman year. but as senior year and graduation get closer, i'm a little nervous. the same comfortable faces that i've grown up with since kindergarten will be gone forever. not only have i completely changed this year, i've gotten to know the real me a little bit. i've always pictured myself having a typical lifestyle one day -- married with two kids in a suburban neighborhood. but after this year, i'm so confused. i don't know what i want anymore. is college really necessary or do my parents just want me to go because it's the next routine step for most teenagers? why can't i just do what makes me happy? i don't care about making A's or learning math formulas, i just want to travel the world & take too many pictures! life is short, why shouldn't i do what makes me happy? i feel like i've wasted the last 3 years of my life at midlothian. the only thing i've learned is how bad i want to get as far away from these people as possible. i need to find diversity and people who live through music! i don't fit in with midlothian's fake and snobby aura at all.
prom is in two weeks and i'm not sure why, but it's stessing me out. at least i'm going with matt daniel, a senior & baseball playa at trinity. he's basically an alcoholic so he should be the best date ever!
baseball season is still lingering on, although this will be the last week if we don't make play offs. being the baseball manager was probably the best decision i've ever made & i'm gonna miss putting the bases down, filling up the water bucket, and joking with the guys everyday.
two weekends ago, i went with ray and tiki man to see natural selection (arman and reyes' new band) play for the castaway's grand opening! it's amazing how much music effects my life and i love how i migrate to people who feel the exact same. afterwards, mindy, missy & i went to pb's throwdown where we met "THE TRUCK" a.k.a rape-herrrr! yeah, scary st. chris boys who suck at beer pong! it was a fun & new experience nonetheless!
then, last weekend i saw peter pan! it was the first school play i've ever enjoyed. saturday morning consisted of sats, which turned out to be surprisingly enjoyable considering we had 45 minutes to talk in the open commons beforehand! my social life always overrides any education. but wow, it was nice seeing everyoneee from trinity, james river & midlo! afterwards, drew & i took a road trip to fork union for the baseball gameeee!
i've spent hours talking to drew online lately. and i love it. the weird thing is, i didn't care for him at all last summer. he's everything i hate. he is amazing at sports, has a 5.0 gpa & wants to go to uva. meanwhile, all i care about is music, photography, freedom & living in the moment. drew is everything i'm not and the fact that we're so different is what makes our friendship so interesting. plus, he makes me laugh and he's open-minded when it comes to my views and the way i choose to live my life. i'm glad i have him to talk to =)
okay, i'm done for now.
peace&love______always.
Lawson1199: shes so fucking fat
Lawson1199: if she ever says my name again just be like he said lose some weight jesus christ
Lawson1199: how much does she weigh
Lawson1199: i woudnt use an ipod i would listen to cookie the whole time
Lawson1199: tell cookie im pissed hes not gonna be at the game
Lawson1199: haha good luck tomorrow
hahahahahahaha